Friday, March 23, 2012

Letting go

This post may not be somewhat funny, so that was just a warning in case you need a tissue. Go ahead, grab it now. I'll wait.
I felt the need to post this and get this off my chest. I have (had) a friend. I say have (had) because I really don't know where we stand. Anyhoo, I had this friend who I could talk to about certain things and we laughed and joked about all kinds of things. I had known her for quite sometime and most times, I would be the one who was helping her to be uplifted. She would call or text me just to say she need encouragement and I was there to help lift her spirits or just find something funny to talk about. I was the one who was there when her man left her and I was the one who was there to just listen. I never bragged about it, because I felt that part of my mission was to help people bring their laughter out.

Well one day, I realized that I hadn't heard from her like I normally did and just wanted to call to see if things were ok. There was no response when I called her, and so I figured that maybe she didn't want to verbally talk, so I then texted her and I still didn't get no response. I wondered if something was wrong cause that was not like her not to respond. I went on Facebook to send her a message to contact me, but there was still no response. I remembered a conversation a while back that she had mentioned that she was thinking about moving, so then I said to myself that maybe her phone is off because she decided to move and I'll give it a few days for her phone to get turned back on.

A few days passed, and then a week...awkward! I asked someone who knew her if they had heard from her, and they just said they have been trying to get in touch with her too but no response. I am not the kind of person to just go knocking on people's doors because one never knows what situation they will be faced with, so I just kept sending messages but still no response. One day, not too soon after that, I saw where she posted something on FB and I then commented on it and told her to get in touch with me but she did not. I kinda let it go from there, because I was the one who was trying to get in touch with her but she was not trying to get in touch with me. It kind of bothered me a little of how you can just stop being friends just like that without an explanation or anything and I know that I haven't done anything to hurt her. So another week went by and I hadn't heard from her, and I went on FB to send her a message, but she had deleted her page. WOW!

A week turned into two weeks, then three and four. My hubby asked about her and said that he don't hear me saying anything about her. I told him that I am letting the Lord work out whatever it is he is working out. I didn't bash her or anything. I also told hubby that sometimes people come in our lives for reasons, and then some for seasons and I let that go and so did hubby. I would pass by her place and wondered how she is doing but nothing more. My kids even asked about her and I would say that I think she is fine. About two months from not hearing from her, hubby and I stopped by the store for a few items and I saw her out the corner of my eye. I did a double take and looked again. I gently smiled and gave a wave and was ready to go and embrace her but she just threw up her hand as if to wave goodbye. She did not smile back and then she walked away. It was as if this was a movie going in slow motion. I keep replaying it in my mind and I need to let it go. I haven't heard from her in about 8 weeks now and I don't think she will come around.

The hard part is that I don't know what happened. We went from talking and laughing one day to strangers the next day. I have tried to reach out to her but she is not reaching back. People sometimes think that adults don't hurt and we do hurt, especially if you have been friends with someone for years and it seems like a faded memory as if nothing was ever there. The most hurtful part in all of this is that she could not be a bigger person or woman enough to come to me and say how she felt about our friendship and that something was bothering her. It's in God's hand and that is all I have left to give.

1 comment:

  1. I've had this happen to me and it really does hurt. But you have the right attitude about it all. Just remember that it's HER loss. You did all you could to remain a loyal friend. If she doesn't want to reciprocate than its not a friendship that you need in your life right now.