Only a vessel

On Saturday evening, hubby and I took both children to the mall to let them find something just because. It wasn't their birthdays, and it wasn't a Christmas gift either. They had been doing really well around the house and in school and we just wanted them to get something because we love them. I am not a mall person, but I know they would probably want to go. So I pulled out the Belk credit card and told them their limit was $25.00 each. I know it doesn't sound like much but it was an appreciation from us to them. Our 13 year old son was determined that he would find something no matter what it was. He said even if he had to buy a pack of underwear, he was gonna get it because we didn't have to do it. I was like, "Thank you Jesus for such an humble young man."

However, that 16 year old daughter of ours had a different attitude. She saw some jeans she wanted and I told her to go ahead and get them. She was very indecisive and walked around Belk for quite some time until she brought me to a pair of shoes. I looked at the shoes and thought to myself, "She has lost her everlasting rabbit mind, cause no rabbit in his right mind would have even tried me like that." These shoes cost $80.00 American dollars! Had she been on something? She must have been cause I specifically said $25.00. So I asked her how did she get 25 from 80....she said that she just FIGURED I loved her that much to do it for her. I'm like Tina Turner, "what's love got to do with it." I told her that she was not getting them shoes and that she could go back around the corner and get them jeans she saw. Well, she decides that if she can't have the shoes, she didn't want anything.

Hubby tried to talk to her and I wasn't gonna talk to anybody. I looked at son who had found him a nice shirt and I looked at hubby and I said, "Is everybody ready to go?" Hubby was hesitant and said to daughter, "You sure you don't want to look for anything?" Her music was in her ear and her arms were folded. She shook her head no and looked the other way. I made my way to the counter and I didn't give it a second thought. When we got home, Ms. 16 year old went to her room sulking...and I'm like, what the heck for because she knew the deal was 25.00 and that was it. Later that evening, her head starts hurting and I started thinking of how God says that vengeance was his. I started thinking about just how exactly does God deal with vengeance. I thought: Now we took the kids to the mall and the 16 year old was really showing some ungratefulness...could this be vengeance? I don't know.

Our way is not God's way. I am not here to understand God's purpose or His plan. If he wanted me to know it all, then I don't think I would have been made just a little lower than the angels. I think I would have been his right hand man giving him the peace sign and my "power to the people" fist. My point is this: I don't understand why we have to endure certain things, such as ungrateful children, nagging co-workers, selfish people here and there, headaches, pain., etc......could this be God's vengeance upon us for something we have done in our lives? I am only a vessel that will be used in many ways, bent and shaped and molded, Only a vessel where I will withstand harshness and many cracks. I am only a vessel that has so much to take in and so much to put out. I am only a vessel.

Lovingly yours,